An interview with a woman of a different generation -

I interviewed my good friend, Marian Porter, a second mother to me.  Marian will turn 80 and also celebrate her 60^th wedding anniversary this year.  She is an outgoing, social woman who has many friends of both sexes and considers her friends as one of her greatest accomplishments in life.  Interviewing Marian was meaningful for me because her family and mine have similar socio-economic backgrounds.                                                                                                                

Marian was born in 1932 and grew up on a farm near Schoolcraft, Michigan.  Marian and her twin sister were the two youngest children in her family.  She had two older sisters and an older brother. When Marian was nine years old her older brother went off to World War II.  Her twin sister preferred to be inside helping her mother with household work and Marian enjoyed helping her father outside, and it was necessary for her to do so.  Marian tended cows.  She hand pumped water into a big trough for about 25 cows each day.  She had a faithful dog who accompanied her in her chores and also in her playtime as she like to play outside. As a girl Marian loved to read after school until her dad came in and said, “Where’s my little helper?” then she would go outside and throw hay from the loft down to the cows.  As she grew older she started driving a tractor and many times worked with men and boys on cooperative ventures.                                                                                                  

When I asked if she considered herself to be a “tomboy” she said yes.  In Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions, the authors state, “There is nothing essential, intrinsic, or static about femininity or masculinity; rather they are social categories that mean different things in different societies and in different historic periods” (Shaw and Lee, 105).  As I interviewed Marian about her childhood this thought rang true to me as I considered how women, even girls, took on what may have been considered at that time to be traditional men’s roles during World War II.   In, “The Social Construction of Gender,” Judith Lorber states that the terms “man” and “woman” are created by the process of gender and that people learn what is expected of them and act in these ways to maintain the gender order (127). I would add to that: within a particular culture or time period.  I think that necessity is a great equalizer and in times of social stress, like war; and in specific cultures, like farming communities, gender differences are not as pronounced. I grew up in the country also and was considered a “tomboy” whereas my schoolmates in town were feminine in a different “demographic” sense.      

 Marian worked in a laboratory after she graduated from high school.  She enjoyed working and being around people.  She stayed at home when she began to have her six children.  She felt bored with housework and missed being around people.  She worked part time when her children were in school and eventually went back to work full time until retirement.  Marian liked working; she believes it is good for your health and mind.  She had various jobs and says she never felt discriminated against as a woman in the work place. Her jobs were obtained largely by circumstances; someone who knew her would ask her to come to work for them.                      

Marian’s comments about liking to work and being bored doing housework echoes the sentiments of Betty Friedan’s, The Feminine Mystique, “We can no longer ignore that voice within women that says: ‘I want something more than my husband and my children and my home.”    Marion told me that, “Then people married, had families, and the women stayed home.”   In, “Claiming an Education,” Adrienne Rich quotes Elizabeth Barrett Browning, “women want to be made to think actively: their apprehension is quicker than that of men, but their defect lies for the most part in the logical faculty and in  the higher mental activities” (25).  Rich goes on to say, “Note that she implies a defect which can be remedied by intellectual training – not an inborn lack of ability” (25).  Marian said she would have liked to go to college but there was just not the money so she believed she could not go. Also it was not common in her social group for her contemporaries to go to college.

 Being in that next generation after Marian’s I am thankful that college was more accessible to working class people.   Like Marian, I also stayed home with my children, but it was not because I felt it was the only option I had.  I could have pursued a career but I choose to stay home and be with my children, both are noble pursuits, and this freedom of choice is healthy and valuable.

References

Shaw, Susan. Lee, Janet. Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions. (105). 2012.

Lorber, Judith. “The Social Construction of Gender.” In, Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions. (127). 2012.

Friedan, Betty. “Excerpts from: The Feminine Mystique (1963).”

Rich, Adrienne. “Claiming an Education.”  In, Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions.  (25). 2012.

I interviewed Marian Porter, her phone number: (269) 552-4102